Giant Robot Invasion!

The Complaineum has opened its doors for business! This label will be used for all of my videos about everyday life. In this episode, I talk about applying for college, which is apparently harder than training yourself to breathe in space.

2009 has been an interesting year. After all, I started Giant Robot Invasion in March, and the entire world was blessed by its presence. Now that 2010 looms on the horizon, I figure it’s a perfect time to look over the last seven months and choose the best posts of 2009. Of course, every post is great, but like Animal Farm, some posts are just more important than others.

Duke Nukem Is Mantacular – The always energetic Badass McKenzie reviews the original Duke Nukem trilogy. Why? Because failing to tell people just how great Duke Nukem is a crime punishable by EXPLOSION.

Fox Kids Club’s “Totally Kids” Magazine – The greatest Saturday morning cartoon block of the 90s needs a kickass magazine to go with it. Fortunately, Fox Kids didn’t drop the ball. Here’s an inside look at an issue of the Fox Kids Club’s epic mag.

The Berenstain Bear Scouts and the Sinister Smoke Ring, Part One and Part Two – A book so big that one post couldn’t contain it! Can the Bear Scouts defeat the evils of smoking? And while we’re at it, can they make sure all smokers look like complete jackasses? YOU be the judge!

Even MORE Messages From The Power Rangers – The Power Rangers public service announcements were all terrible, and this latest batch is no different. In fact, the only thing I learned from these is to promptly beat the crap out of anyone waltzing around wearing tie dye and a beret. Now I know what to look for…and knowledge is half the battle!

The Magic School Bus and the Wonderful Freakout – Join the weirdest class in the history of forever as they go on the most disturbing field trips known to man. Oh, sure, you may be concerned now, but at least they’re learning. Just look at these SAT scores!

Don’t Copy That Floppy Or We’ll Cut An Album, I Swear To God – SIIA’s infamous anti-piracy video is required viewing for any would-be software pirates. What better way to remove any silly morals about the practice than with the whitest black rapper this side of planet Earth? The sequel is also a great tool for those instant boosts of pirating motivation.

Friends Don’t Let Friends Watch The Windows 95 Video Guide – Windows 95 was a great operating system, but you’d never know that if you watched this painful promotional video. I’d say the famous guest stars redeemed it, but lying like that would be an insult to deception. Also in this article: big Russian guys!

Chex Quest: This Nostalgia Comes With A Free Game! (Seriously) – This was possibly the best cereal promotion ever concieved. Where’s that brilliant man who decided to release a modified version of Doom with Chex cereal? I want to give him a medal with a genie inside, and the genie is a girl genie with no shirt on. There, that’s like a free wish altogether.

The Bubsy Cartoon: What Can Possibly Go Right? – I can safely say that nothing went right in this abysmal cartoon based on an abysmal waste of pixels called Bubsy the Bobcat. If this was a school project, I’d give it a negative F, which is an F so powerful that the failing student is sucked inside into another dimension where everything is wrong. Coincidentally, this is a world Bubsy rules over.

Flint The Time Detective: Chris Hansen Needs To Tell Japan To Take A Seat – I try to forgive Japan for all of its faults, but this might be pushing it a bit too far. There is so much scandal in this article that it has to be neatly packed inside a moving truck, for fear that the scandal will roam free to attack celebrities everywhere. This CANNOT happen!

Here’s to a great 2010, everyone. See you next year!

DC Comics’s “Countdown” event was considered a universal pile of suck…but could there be a moment that made it all worthwhile? Find out in Today’s Really Kickass Moment!

Didn’t catch my roast of Noah Antwiler, AKA The Spoony One? Now you can watch it right here!

This monologue was an epic project in the making. Since I didn’t have a video camcorder like the other roasters did, I knew the monologue had to be the strongest point of my roast. Here’s a basic play-by-play of how it came together:

1. I wrote down as much as I knew about Spoony, citing references to his work and other facts. I organized these into categories like People, Places, and Things for a better overview. These facts were written down as normal statements, which I could then tinker with to provide setups for my jokes. This is partly the reason why some jokes may seem strange when compared to “normal ones” – they were tailored for the audience at the Spoony Experiment.

2. I then picked 25 good facts to turn into jokes. Thus began a long process of finding the right kind of wording for each joke to match my style of humor. Joke writing takes a while – the right words will determine if your joke is passable or a real gem.

3. Once I had my jokes, I organized them into a point-by-point monologue, where one point transitioned into the other. This meant I had to cut a few jokes I rather liked. You can’t just slap any old joke in there – it’s gotta be coherent.

4. I rewrote each joke into a conversational tone to make them sound more natural during recording. This meant saying the jokes over and over again until, again, I stumbled on the right wording. Spoken humor, like stand-up comedy, is a far different beast than written humor, so it has to be treated accordingly.

5. When I was satisfied with the new rewrite, I recorded each joke as a seperate line to mix together into the final product.

6. I gathered a bunch of images and a background song, then mixed them all together with the recordings in my movie editor. After that, I outputted the final video and sent it off to the roastmaster for integration into the full roast.

This roast, while not as involved as my Space Quest 5 series, was still challenging in its own way. I had a blast, and I’d love more opportunities to do this kind of work in the future. (Feel free to drop me a line if you know anyone who needs to get burned!)

I join forces with several prominent forumgoers of The Spoony Experiment to roast Noah Antwiler (The Spoony One) for the three year anniversary of his website! I really enjoyed writing this roast, and I’d love opportunities to write more in the future. Thanks for all the years of entertainment, Spoony!